*N* is for Nonplus
Disclaimer: Scarecrow and Mrs. King and all
recognizable characters belong to
Warner Bros. and Shoot The Moon Enterprises Ltd. I'm just borrowing them,
since THEY won't do anything with them
anymore, for my pleasure and hopefully
yours! The story and the flannel shirt are completely my own. This story was
originally written a very long time ago. I
started it in January of 2002. I have
recently read a few fanfics that have similar lines and situations. Any
resemblance to any other fanfic or one of
the episodes is entirely unintentional
and no infringement is intended.
References to:
A Lovely Little Affair written by Kathleen
Shelling, Over the Limit written by
Tom Roplewski, Sour Grapes Tagalogue by T.A. Miller, Utopia Now written by
Robert Bielak, J. Edgar's Ghost written by
David Brown, 'T-R-O-U-B-L-E' and
'Anymore' by Travis Tritt, 'Man, I Feel Like a Woman' by Shania Twain and
Mutt Lange.
No infringement intended
Rating: PG for mild language
Summary: A *night out* for Amanda leads to
more than she expected.
Timeline: After J. Edgar's Ghost - just
before Thanksgiving 1985.
Type: Filler, songfic.
Feedback: Yes, yes, yes! Constructive
criticism accepted with a very open
mind, on list or off, I could use the help. Flames will be used to light my
husband's cigarettes as he is always losing
his lighters. (Maybe if I get no
flames he'll quit?)
Archive: SMKFanfic Archive, with the other
ABC Challenge stories; SMKFiction.net.
Thanks: To Merel, who was the only person
to see this story in its very first
incarnation and didn't laugh her head off at me. This story wouldn't be here
today if it weren't for her. Also to the KL
girls for their comments. Y'all are
great. And last, but most definitely not least, to my friend and
super-beta, Kathy. Your support,
brainstorming, and correction have been and
will continue to be priceless and
unquestionably the reason my stories are
postable. ;) It is an absolutely incredible
*working* relationship.
Notes: This started out a very different
story. It was totally AU and I really
didn't like where it went. It's been *reformatted* and hopefully stays
within the canon of Lee and Amanda, even if
the Amanda/Francine canon is off. I'm
painfully aware that the country music of the late 80's was no where near
the country music of today, and that none
of these songs were released when the
show was in its original run, but I couldn't help myself.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
As Amanda readied herself for her latest
assignment she felt strangely excited.
Not the typical pre-case excitement, more like relief at getting
away for an evening. She was partnered with
Francine this time, assigned to meet a
contact and complete an easy drop at a run-down country bar that
evening. Both women had been working more
overtime than usual lately and were
feeling the stress seep into their personal lives as well. The ease of the
job was going to be a reprieve from the
previous week and although she and
Francine weren't exactly friends they were both looking forward to the
*milk-run* assignment.
Amanda surveyed her reflection in the
mirror-jeans, cowboy boots, her hair up
off her neck and a T-shirt with one of
Lee's plaid flannel shirts over it.
She had worn the shirt home a few weeks ago after a stake out with Lee. The
weather had turned cold that night and she
didn't have a sweater. Lee had grabbed
it out of the back of his car and put it around her shoulders. It was
huge on her but would look better than
anything she had in her closet. She
shrugged as she knotted the bottom of the shirt at her waist.
'He'll never know.' As she pulled the
collar up closer to her neck, the
distinct smell of Lee lingered in the fabric, and she closed her eyes,
inhaled deeply, and sighed. She had a hard
time believing her life sometimes.
Here she was working at the Agency for a little over two years and with the
top agent in the country.
'Not to mention the most handsome,
intriguing, frustrating . . .' Amanda
shook her head in an attempt to clear her mind. Turning from her reflection
in the mirror she noticed the illuminated
numbers on her bedside clock. She took
a deep breath. "Time to go." Grabbing
her purse she left the room and headed downstairs.
"I'll be late mother, I'm . . . uh . . .
going out with friends from work,
remember?"
"Yes, dear. Have fun. Oh," Dotty raised her
eyebrows and pointed at Amanda. "Will
your Mr. Stedman . . . "
"Stetson, Mother"
" . . . Mr. Stetson be there?" Dotty
finished with a mischievous grin.
"Mo-ther." Amanda sighed "He's not *mine*
and no, he will not be there. This is
just the girls tonight."
'It would be nice to see him tonight,'
Amanda shook the familiar thought out
of her head. It would also do her good to be away from him . . . to just
relax for one night. Trying to keep her
mind off how he had been making her
feel lately had become quite a job in itself. Half of the time she wondered
why she was even trying. It seemed the more
she tried not to think about her
partner, the more frequently he showed up in her dreams and thoughts, not to
mention her backyard. No, it was better
that he would be nowhere in sight
tonight.
"Good bye, Mother"
"Good night, dear. Don't do anything I
wouldn't do!"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Oh come ON, Billy." Lee was getting more
annoyed by the minute. "Lee, what's
the problem?" Billy shrugged and shook his head. "Amanda and
Francine have the job. That's how it is."
He cast a questioning glance at Lee as
he turned to grab his coat. Lee sighed.
"Anyway, Scarecrow, I thought you'd be
grateful." He feigned a hurt look.
"It's a drop at a country bar. Take a good chunk out of your evening. I'm sure
you have something much better planned." He said with a wink. Truth was
he had heard the office gossip. Scarecrow,
most eligible bachelor at the Agency,
hadn't been seen with anyone in quite awhile. Hadn't been seen
anywhere at all in quite awhile except with
his partner. He had seen the growing
attraction between his favorite team. Billy had a feeling it was
something else but wasn't about to say
anything to the other agent given his
present mood.
"Yeah, you're right Billy." Lee
acknowledged, not wanting to think about the
implications of his arguing with Billy over
this. He headed for the door and
stopped with his hand on the knob. "Not my cup of tea. See you tomorrow."
"G'night Scarecrow"
As the door closed behind Lee, Billy shook
his head with a huge grin. He knew why
his agent wanted that assignment even if Lee himself didn't have a clue.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"This is getting ridiculous," Lee muttered
as he slid into the Corvette. He
thumped the palm of his hand against the steering wheel and leaned his head
back on the headrest.
"Damn." The more time he and Amanda spent
together working, or, lately, under
the guise of working, the more he wanted to be around her. He physically
needed to be within view of her. He found
reasons to call her, show up in her
backyard, and keep her working late. Daily. Up until recently he had
convinced himself it was just because he
felt the need to protect her. He
brought her into this business; he needed to keep her safe. But he was losing
the battle with his reasoning, and those
reasons sounded more and more flimsy
every time he pulled them out. No matter how high the walls he built to keep
them out, or how he buried them, he
couldn't help the thoughts and feelings
that ran almost constantly through his
mind. The almost insane jealousy he'd
felt at the thought of Amanda being attracted to a stuffy, boring art
restorer. He still couldn't believe he'd
actually sounded so jealous while
talking to Amanda. She must have noticed, he'd noticed. Who did he think he
was fooling, when he showed up in her
bedroom in the middle of the night
almost two months ago? He could have called; he could have caught her in the
morning. But he'd felt that urge, the
overpowering need to see and touch her,
no matter what the time or place. Then
there was the kiss after the McNeil
case. Regardless of how innocent he had intended it to be, it had stirred up
things he really hadn't felt prepared to
deal with just yet. Glancing up, he
caught a glimpse of himself in the rearview mirror. Unable to look himself
in the eye, he turned away with a disgusted
sigh.
"Come on, Stetson. Get it together."
Lee pulled the Corvette up in front of his
building and headed inside. He knew
exactly what he was getting himself into. And that was what bothered him
the most. He knew, and it still wasn't
enough to stop him. He waited
impatiently for the elevator, jabbing at the up button repeatedly until the
door opened with a ding. Although the
confines of the elevator offered little
room for his nervous habit, Lee paced
inside the cramped space until the door
slid open on his floor. As he unlocked and
pushed open the door to his apartment,
he stopped, tossing his keys on the small table in the entryway.
Glancing quickly at a few half-empty
glasses and scattered dirty laundry he
headed for the bedroom, shedding his jacket, tie, and shirt as he went. A
fleeting thought that maybe he should stay
home and clean caused him to laugh out
loud. Nothing could get by him anymore without causing thoughts of Amanda
or what she would do. After finding and
pulling on his jeans and socks, he
rummaged through his closet in search of his plaid flannel shirt. It was the
only one he had found that didn't make him
look like the front seat of a DeSoto
and he had gotten a little attached to it. As he pushed clothes out of
his way, three plastic sheathed tuxedos
caught his attention.
"Two black, one white," he chuckled wryly.
"Essential to any good intelligence
operative's wardrobe." He stopped abruptly as he realized it had
been months since he'd donned one of them
for anything more than an agency
obligation.
Shaking his head, he reached further into
the closet one last time, his shoulder
getting caught on a silky garment. He pulled his arm back but found
himself hopelessly entangled in the pink
silk. Extricating his arm from the
robe, he held it up and snorted as he recognized the elegant monogram on the
front
"Crystal'"
he whispered, with a smile and slight nod of his head. If he
thought it had been a while since he'd worn
the tuxes, it'd been even longer since
this robe had been worn.
"Damn!" he ground out, not for the first
time that afternoon. Wadding the robe
up he threw it back into the far corner of the closet. With a sigh he
realized the shirt was no where to be
found. At least not in the bedroom. And
he didn't have time to search the rest of
the apartment. 'It could be anywhere
in here.' Hadn't he just worn it recently? 'Oh well, no big deal.
This'll do.' He thought as he settled on a
blue denim shirt with a suede collar.
Catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror, he sighed heavily and
ran a hand through his hair again, leaving
it there for a moment. This time he
couldn't deny it. A relative stranger looked back at him. His outer
appearance was the same but these glimpses
of the man inside were disconcerting.
The playboy image was slipping further and further into his
past and he had recently begun to realize
it wasn't something he was proud of
anymore. It was a façade he slipped into - albeit for quite a long time – a
role he'd been playing. Shaking his head
slowly he turned and headed to the
living room.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Amanda and Francine exchanged amused
glances as they walked into the run-down
bar.
"This is not someplace I'd ever expect to
see you, Francine." Amanda said with a
laugh.
"Oh, and I suppose you're a regular?"
Francine shot back with a grin. "Come
on, we've got *work* to do," she said.
Amanda shook her head in amazement. This
was going to be an interesting night,
she thought with a smile. She had to admit Francine definitely looked
the part in a camel colored cowboy hat,
crisp white shirt with an embroidered
yoke, tight Levi's, and snakeskin boots. Amanda had forgone a hat—she
thought it was a bit much.
As they entered the main room of the bar,
the twang of country music along with
the smell of too much smoke and even more beer overtook them.
"Ugh, beer." Francine wrinkled her nose and
stuck out her tongue. "I didn't think
about having to deal with THAT. They do serve wine here don't they?"
"I don't know Francine." Amanda laughed as
she followed the blonde through the
maze of tables. Neither woman had seen the sleek silver Corvette in the
very back of the lot behind a rather large,
quite beat-up, baby blue pick-up.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Lee Stetson sat at the back of the bar,
feet up on the seat of the empty chair
next to him, and let his gaze sweep around the room again. He had a
perfect view of the sawdust covered dance
floor, the bar, and door. His
attention was drawn again to the door as it opened for what felt like the
hundredth time tonight. He had been there
45 minutes already and was beginning
to wonder if the assignment sheet he had sneaked a glance at before
leaving had been correct. It was becoming
more and more difficult to look
inconspicuous sitting there alone. It had been even harder to remain alone.
He chuckled as he thought about what the
'pre-Amanda' Lee would have done with
the offers he had turned down this evening. Especially the persistent
little brunette he had cursorily fended off
just a few moments ago. Lee laughed to
himself and took a swig from his beer bottle. 'If I was about
thirteen years younger . . .' He sobered as
another thought struck him. 'Or had it
been just a year ago . . . ' His train of thought was interrupted as
first Francine and then Amanda strolled
into the bar.
"Well, it's about time ladies," he
muttered. Both were flushed from the cold
and wore expressions he had never seen on
their faces-when they were together
anyway. He was a little stunned to see the two of them acting sociable. They
certainly looked like they were out for an
evening of fun tonight. A quick glance
around the bar revealed he wasn't the only one watching these two
women. Every time a female or two stepped
through the door all male eyes were
immediately trained on them. And this particular pair was no different.
Lee sighed heavily and downed the half-
empty beer in front of him in one
swig. "This is not going to be easy."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The two agents dropped their coats at a
table and sat down. A waitress
appeared and both placed their orders.
The music was extremely loud but actually
had a good beat and as the words of
the song penetrated Lee's thoughts, he shook his head and chuckled to himself.
'I don't miss much if it happens on the
dance hall floor;
Mercy, look what just walked through that
door.
Hey, hey, good L-double O-K-I-N-G,
I smell T-R-O-U-B-L-E'
The male singer's voice reflected what Lee
was thinking.
"You can say that again." Lee sighed as the
rest of the song continued unnoticed
to him. He had focused on Amanda and was watching her with rapt
admiration. She looked right at home here,
not uncomfortable as Lee had thought
she'd be. She was quickly becoming a very good agent and partner. 'Partner,'
Lee thought with a snort. It still surprised him that he thought
of her that way. He'd had to admit more and
more lately that she'd been an asset
in every case she'd helped him with.
He motioned to his waitress for another
beer and extricated his long legs from
the chair next to him. He leaned his elbows on the table and tilted the
bottle of beer to his mouth for a drink. He
was still slightly unnerved by his
actions. Amanda and Francine could handle this assignment alone and Billy
was right, this wasn't his 'scene'.
Nevertheless, he felt that somewhat
unsettling, but familiar, need to be near Amanda tonight, even if he wasn't
*with* her.
'They won't even know I'm here,' he
thought. He watched as the waitress
brought the ladies their drinks and Lee laughed out loud.
"Ok, Francine," he said quietly. "Let's see
you drink that!" He smirked at the
beer placed before her.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Oh, I hope I don't have to drink more than
one of these." Francine whispered to
Amanda, who just laughed in response.
'I hope *I* don't have to drink more than
one of these either.' She thought
wryly.
They had observed their contact sitting at
the bar and were discussing him at
their table when a new song began.
'Come on girls,
Let's go'
The song caught Francine's attention and
she smiled wickedly.
"I LOVE this song!" She then waggled a
finger at Amanda. "Don't you tell a
SOUL! Come on Amanda!"
"I don't know . . ." She began hesitantly.
"Come ON!" Francine grabbed her hand and
pulled her onto the dance floor.
"Francine?" yelled Amanda.
"What?"
"I love this song, too!" She said with a
grin.
Lee nearly spit his beer across the table
at the sight before him.
'I'm going out tonight
I'm feeling alright
Gonna let it
All hang out
Wanna make some noise
Really raise my voice
Yeah, I wanna
Scream and shout
No inhibitions
Make no conditions
Get a little outta line
I ain't gonna act politically correct
I only wanna have a good time'
Lee couldn't believe what he was seeing.
Amanda, his Amanda, was acting like,
well, every other woman in the bar. This was a side of her he had never
realized existed. Fleetingly, he wondered
what other things about her he didn't
know. He had thought he knew them all.
'Obviously not.' he thought. Sitting back
with a satisfied grin on his face he
thought, 'I'm definitely going to enjoy this!'
'The best thing about being a woman
Is the prerogative to have a little fun and
Oh, oh, oh go totally crazy
Forget I'm a lady
Men's shirts, short skirts
Oh, oh, oh, really go wild
Yeah, do it in style
Oh, oh, oh, get in the action
Feel the attraction
Color my hair
Do what I dare
Oh, oh, oh, I wanna be free to
Feel the way I feel
Man! I feel like a woman'
Lee gulped down another mouthful of beer.
'That's where that shirt went!' A slow
smile crept across his face as he
realized Amanda was wearing his favorite shirt and that it looked decidedly
better on her than it did on him. He
remembered now what had happened. They
had been in his car on a stake out. It had been a very warm day and Amanda
had just a T-shirt on with her jeans. After
sunset, the night air had turned
chilly, and he could see Amanda rubbing her arms for warmth. He had retrieved
his flannel shirt from the back of the 'Vette,
and Amanda had worn it for the rest of
the evening. She had taken it home, saying she wanted to wash it
before returning it. Lee had seen Amanda in
his clothes before but normally it was
just for convenience as it had been that time. The thought that she
had picked it out to wear knowing it was
his gave him a warm contented feeling.
" . . . Sir?" The waitress' voice broke
through Lee's awareness.
"Hmmm? Oh. I'm sorry." He struggled to
bring himself back to the present. She
gave him a knowing smile. "That's ok,
honey. I was just wondering if you needed anything else?"
"No, thank you. I'm fine for now." He
answered. 'Real professional,
Scarecrow.' He admonished himself as he turned his attention back to the
dance floor, or rather one specific woman
on the dance floor.
'The girls need a break
Tonight we're gonna take
The chance to
Get out on the town
We don't need romance
We only wanna dance
We're gonna let our hair hang down . . .'
The words of the song and how much Amanda
and Francine were enjoying them was
not lost on Lee, who snorted and took a swig from his beer bottle.
"We'll see about that Mrs. King," he said
out loud.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The song finished and Amanda and Francine
plopped down laughing and out of
breath back at their table.
"Amanda, I'm glad Billy did this." Francine
said with an uncharacteristically
friendly smile. "I really can't do anything like this with my fri . . ." she
paused, a contemplative look on her face.
"Acquaintances, I guess you'd call
them." She finished. "This is actually kind of fun." Francine smiled again at
Amanda.
Amanda returned the smile and nodded.
"I know exactly what you mean Francine."
She left it at that but felt the
beginnings of a bond starting to form between herself and the normally
pretentious woman next to her.
The music continued but they stayed seated,
conversing as best they could about
the assignment over the loud music in the bar. They continued to keep
their contact in sight but hadn't yet
gotten the signal from him to complete
the drop.
Lee's attention was caught as he watched
two men approach Amanda and Francine's
table. Both women smiled brightly and said something, which caused
the men to turn around and head toward the
bar.
"There you go Amanda, keep your mind on the
job." Lee smiled and relaxed a bit but
froze again as the two men returned with drinks in their hands.
"Oh come on, give me a break!" Lee moaned
as Francine smiled up at one of the
cowboys and gratefully took the white wine that he offered her. The other
cowboy had squatted down near Amanda's
chair his arm circling the back of it.
Lee saw Amanda and Francine exchange a
glance and small shrug.
"No." Lee sat up quickly, almost knocking
over his beer in the process. It took
every ounce of strength to keep from moving across the dance floor in
their direction. The DJ had started a slow
song and the two couples made their
way to the dance floor. Lee glanced at Francine to find a slightly
dazed look on her face. But that wasn't who
he was interested in watching. He
searched the crowd and found the couple he was looking for. It suddenly felt
a few degrees warmer in the bar. Amanda
looked like she was really enjoying
herself. Lee knew how much she enjoyed dancing and had foolishly told himself
it was dancing with him that she enjoyed so
much-not just dancing in general - but
the look on her face told him otherwise. He felt his blood pressure rise as he
stood and downed the remainder of his third beer. The empty bottle
returned to the table with more force than
he intended but he was already moving
away from the table and toward the couple he was completely focused
on. He got halfway to the dance floor
before stopping abruptly.
"What the hell am I doing?!" He berated
himself for his lack of control. The
tempo of the song slowed a bit and Lee watched as Amanda's partner pulled her
closer against him. Lee's fists clenched at
his sides as he deliberately turned
and went back to his seat.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Francine was casually scanning the bar,
checking out her surroundings as she
danced with the large, well-built cowboy.
"What the . . ." She could have sworn she
saw Lee Stetson in the back of the bar
headed their way. Had something happened in the case? Was something
wrong? No, she would have gotten a
signal-not Lee making a personal visit.
What on earth was Scarecrow doing here?
'Can't be him.' she thought 'He wouldn't be
caught dead in place like this on his
off time.' She laughed to herself. 'Then again, neither would I!" She
shook her head and passed it off as her
imagination. He'd have no reason to be
here.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Damn!" Lee muttered. "Control, Scarecrow!"
He could have sworn Francine looked
directly at him but she showed no sign of recognition. Lucky for him
she seemed completely enamored of her
companion.
Lee sat and watched the ladies for another
two hours as they danced and mingled,
all the while looking relaxed and quite at ease with each other. He couldn't
believe how hard this was to deal with. He'd never had trouble with
women before. Hell, he hadn't had trouble
just three hours ago. But now he was
feeling claustrophobic and a bit ill at ease. He was trapped, though, as
his reason for being there was between him
and the only visible door. Weren't
these places supposed to have emergency exits? He reached up with one finger
to loosen his collar, only to find it all
ready unbuttoned. Clearing his throat,
he shifted in his seat and glanced around the room again. Nope. There
was no way out. Not that he truly wanted to
leave. For the hundredth time tonight,
he asked himself why he had come here. His glance stopped on Amanda
and he watched as she leaned in and spoke
to her partner. Shouldn't that be him
across the table from her? She was his partner, not Francine's. But there
she was, doing a perfectly good job,
regardless of whom she was with or the
situation. She didn't need him to be with her every step of the way.
Suddenly, it all became clear. He knew now
that he'd follow her anywhere.
"Blind through a blizzard at
midnight."
He gave a slight laugh. "Or to a bar
I wouldn't otherwise be caught dead in
without good reason." Shaking his
head, he gave another laugh and spoke to himself again.
"You've got it bad, Stetson. Now what are
you going to do about it?"
Amanda had danced only with the cowboy from
earlier and had turned down other
offers. Until now. Another slow song started and he had returned to claim her
again. Amanda threw a questioning look to
Francine and was encouraged by the
look on her face.
"Go for it." Francine mouthed with a sly
smile and raised eyebrow.
"I need to have a talk with Ms. Desmond on
Monday." Lee muttered under his
breath. As he watched Amanda dance with the tall, handsome cowboy he couldn't
help but listen to the words of the song
they were swaying to. He stared at
Amanda intently, suddenly not caring if he was spotted or not. This just
wasn't working. The walls were crumbling
faster than he could build them back
up.
'I can't go on like this.' His thoughts
were stopped by the words drifting
back to him from the dance floor.
'I can't hide the way I feel about you
anymore
I can't hold the hurt inside, keep the pain
out of my eyes anymore
My tears no longer waiting, my resistance
ain't that strong
My mind keeps recreating a life with you
alone
And I'm tired of pretending, I don't love
you anymore'
Amanda's thoughts were not on her current
dance partner as they moved across the
floor together. The words of the song they were dancing to were bringing
to mind a different partner. She smiled
softly and closed her eyes. A now
familiar scene played out in her mind as the words of the song enveloped
her--Lee telling her he loved her, holding
her, kissing her. Not telling her
later that it had been 'just business'. It was a fantasy that had begun to
seem within reach. One that left her
feeling a bit out of sorts. The sound of
her dance partner's voice startled her out
of her daze. She answered with what
she hoped was an appropriate response.
"Hmmm? Oh, I'm fine. Just getting tired,
that's all."
Her companion, seemingly satisfied with her
answer, was quickly forgotten again as
she felt an exciting, familiar warmth spread through out her body.
She briefly scanned the room. She knew that
feeling. It was the same feeling she'd
had that night Lee had shown up in her bedroom and she'd been feeling
it more and more recently. But no, it was
just her fantasy making her feel this
way. Lee wasn't here. Why would he be here? She was sure he could have
had a much more entertaining evening going
on at this very moment. However, that
thought was quickly replaced with memories of the last few weeks.
Breathlessly, she realized their recent
encounters weren't that far off from
her fantasies. It hadn't exactly been two cold people huddled in that swamp,
nor had his abrupt dumping of Leslie gone
unnoticed. Since before Leslie, there
hadn't been any mention of his girlfriends. Her heart sped up at the
thought of their dinner after her
well-placed blackmail scheme just a few
days ago. And with all the personal time
they'd been spending together away
from work lately, she knew he didn't have the time. Maybe . . .
I've got to take the chance or let it pass
by
If I expect to get on with my life
My tears no longer waiting
Oh, my resistance ain't that strong
Oh, my mind keeps recreating
A life with you alone
And I'm tired of pretending
I don't love you anymore.
Anymore
Lee could not believe his ears. That song!
He'd never been into any of that
romantic 'our song' type stuff but this one smacked him in the face with his
very feelings. His feelings for Amanda.
Before he completed his thought, the song
was over and Amanda was back at her
table. Francine had been on the pay phone in the corner completing the drop
and came back to the table as well. Their
contact had left the bar while Amanda
was dancing. They were now through for the evening.
Lee shook himself out of his thoughts and
got up, pulling on his jacket as he
stood. Carefully, as Francine and Amanda stood talking, Lee slipped past
them, obscured from their view by a group
of people.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The cold air was refreshing after the
smoke-filled bar and Lee breathed in
heartily on his way to the 'Vette. He had to get out of the parking lot
before Amanda and Francine came out and
caught him. Hopefully they wouldn't
stay any longer; Lee knew how Francine could get when she was having fun.
She'd tried many times to get him to stay
at parties after a case was wrapped
up, just to have fun. But Lee had other plans for the remainder of Amanda's
evening. He hadn't quite worked out the
details yet but he knew he wasn't
going home tonight without her.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Well, that wasn't so bad." Francine said
guardedly as they walked out into the
parking lot.
"No, not bad at all." Amanda returned the
smile.
"We may need to do this more often."
Francine stated quietly, gesturing back
and forth between herself and Amanda. Then
her demeanor changed abruptly. "But
let's keep it our little secret for now. People might think I've gone
soft." Francine said gruffly and pointed at
Amanda.
As they got into the Agency issued car,
Amanda was sure she saw the taillights
of a Corvette turning out of the parking lot.
'Oh, come on, Amanda.' She chided herself
silently, realizing once again that
thinking of Lee had become more than a daily thing lately.
" . . .Dropping me off at home?" Francine
had been saying something to her but
she only caught the last part.
"I'm sorry Francine. What were you saying?"
"Where were you Amanda?" Francine laughed.
"I asked if you'd mind dropping me at
my apartment and taking the car back to the Agency alone. I know it's not
standard procedure but I have a hot date
waiting tonight!" Francine raised her
eyebrows and laughed huskily.
"You didn't!?!" Amanda started laughing and
shook her head. "You will never cease
to amaze me Francine."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
After leaving Francine at her apartment,
Amanda headed for the Agency to
exchange the sedan for her station wagon. As she pulled into the underground
lot her heart skipped a beat and her breath
caught.
"Oh . . .my . . .gosh!"
She parked the car and turned it off.
Taking a deep breath, she sat for a
moment trying to compose herself.
'Why on earth is he here?' she thought
frantically. 'I guess I'm going to
find out.' Amanda grabbed her purse,
got out of the agency sedan, and headed across the
nearly vacant lot.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Lee took a deep breath.
"Get a grip Stetson.'"He muttered. But all
he had to do was conjure up thoughts
of Amanda in that cowboy's arms tonight and he was instantly filled with the
same intense feelings he'd experienced earlier in the evening. He'd
been sitting here for nearly an hour
stewing and it had only caused him to
get more agitated. As Amanda emerged from the sedan, Lee opened the door to
the Corvette and stepped out. By the time
she had reached her car and put the
key in the lock, Lee had fallen into step next to her.
"Hi." Lee ran his hand through his hair and
fidgeted as he gave her a nervous
smile. He still wasn't quite sure what he was going to do now that he was
with her. When had things become so awkward
and strained?
"'Hi,' yourself," Amanda answered.
"Hey it's, uh, it's pretty cold out, you
wanna go somewhere and have coffee?"
Lee managed to ask.
"Ok, sure." Amanda answered, still slightly
shocked to find him waiting for her at
this time of night. "I'll follow you." She moved to get into the car.
"No." The urgency in Lee's voice stopped
her. He cleared his throat and looked
down at the ground. After a moment he looked back up at her with
pleading eyes. "Ride with me . . . please?"
He spoke so quietly Amanda had to strain to
hear his request. The look in his eyes
was reminiscent of what had ultimately convinced her to help him two and
a half years ago. She swallowed and
answered shakily.
"Ok." Her head was spinning as she tried to
figure out what he was up to. He still
hadn't told her why he was here and she was pretty sure it had nothing
to do with her case. That and the fact that
he was standing so close to her had
the butterflies in her stomach fluttering like crazy. If she didn't move
soon she was probably going to faint. She
placed one hand on the open door of
the station wagon and turned her back to Lee. As she reached in for her
purse, he stepped close behind her, reached
in, and locked the door. At the same
moment, she straightened. As her back came up against his chest, Amanda
froze and found she could hardly breathe.
Neither one moved for a moment. She
was sure he could feel her heart pounding -- she could certainly feel his.
The realization that he was as affected as
she was sent shivers down her spine.
But then the contact was broken as Lee abruptly shoved the door closed
and turned away. Amanda turned slowly also
and he put his hand at the small of
her back and walked close to her as they headed to the 'Vette.
Amanda stopped as they reached his car. She
was acutely aware of every move he
made. He was so close . . .
Lee opened the door with his right hand and
moved his left to her elbow. As she
slipped into the warmth of the running car, he let his hand slide down to
capture hers. He held it for a moment
longer than necessary and Amanda looked
up at him slowly. Smiling, he released her
hand. As Lee shut the door and went
around to get in the driver's side, she sank back into the seat and
sighed. The music coming from the radio
slowly seeped into her consciousness.
It sounded suspiciously like the music she'd heard earlier at the bar.
'He doesn't listen to this stuff.' She
thought. Maybe he hadn't noticed what
station it was on.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"You can do this Stetson. It's just
Amanda." He said out loud. With a grin
and shake of his head, he sighed. "No, not *just* Amanda." Lee opened the
door and slid into the car next to her.
"Well," he said with newfound
enthusiasm. "Where shall we go?"
"I'm not usually out this late Lee, you're
more familiar with what's open, you
pick," Amanda said with a slight grin.
"Ok." Lee was a bit too eager in his
answer.
"How'd it go tonight?" Lee asked with a
casual sideways glance in her
direction. She sighed and laid her head back on the seat, looking out the
passenger window. Noting her small smile he
stiffened, thinking her reaction was
caused by a certain cowboy she had met a few hours earlier.
"It was weird." Amanda shifted in her seat
so she could look at Lee. "I've never
felt so comfortable with Francine before. Well, only once, but . . . "
Trailing off she smiled again then
continued. "Not one jab tonight, Lee. Not
one! She was nice, friendly, definitely not
herself." She paused as Lee let out a
hearty laugh. "And the assignment was so simple. I don't get many of
those. It felt like we weren't really
working at all. I needed the
distraction, too. With everything . . ."
She stopped in mid sentence as the song on
the radio caught her attention.
'The best thing about being a woman
Is the prerogative to have a little fun and
Oh, oh, oh go totally crazy
Forget I'm a lady
Men's shirts, short skirts
Oh, oh, oh, really go wild'
Amanda gave a quiet laugh and reached out
to turn up the volume a notch. She
missed the grin on Lee's face as he questioned her, their previous
conversation forgotten.
"Like that song?"
"I just heard it at that bar," she said
with a grin. In a quieter voice she
continued thoughtfully. "I have a new appreciation for it." He glanced at her
with a raised eyebrow and nodded.
"By the way, Amanda," he paused and looked
back at the road. "Nice shirt." Amanda
turned her head to look out her window again as a pink tinge crept up
her cheeks.
"Sorry, Lee. I got the assignment too late
to go down to wardrobe and I had
nothing else to wear." She looked down and fingered a button on her coat.
"Well, nothing suitable anyway. I hope you
don't mind. I was going to bring it
back next week after I'd washed it for you . . ."
"Don't worry about it." He glanced at her
out of the corner of his eye. "Looks
better on you anyway."
The last part of what Lee said was almost
too quiet to hear but Amanda did and
her heart skipped a beat. She chose not to respond to his comment at that
point but couldn't ignore how it made her
feel. More and more lately he had been
making comments, saying things that almost had her believing he shared
the feelings she had been trying to hide
for months. Most had been during
conversations over dinners that were becoming more and more frequent.
" . . . do you mind?"
Amanda realized Lee was asking her
something. He had turned the 'Vette around
and was headed toward his neighborhood.
Though she wasn't quite sure what was going
on, she answered, "No, not at all."
Whatever it was Lee wanted she was certainly in no mood to deny him
tonight.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
After determining that it was much too late
to visit the usual haunts for coffee,
Lee had decided to head to his apartment. Nothing was going to keep
him from spending time alone with Amanda
tonight.
"We haven't seen much of each other lately
and I'm leaving for a few days. I'm
on the duty roster for Thanksgiving weekend so I won't be around. I
really wanted to touch base with you before
I left." 'Lame, Scarecrow, really
lame. She's gonna see right through that one'. He thought.
"Sure, that sounds fine Lee" Amanda
repeated quietly. 'So that was his excuse
for meeting me.' She thought with a small
frown. Still, it seemed a bit much to
go to the trouble of waiting around for her and taking her back to his
apartment just to 'touch base.' She sighed
heavily. Just when she thought she
knew where she stood with him he threw her another curve. He'd been different
tonight, somehow. She couldn't quite place
it but there was something there that
definitely hadn't been earlier in the day. Something that was becoming
more and more familiar.
Lee heard her sigh and turned to look at
her. He just caught the look on her
face as she turned her head to the window-again. She had spent most of the
drive looking out that window. He
desperately hoped she wasn't having second
thoughts about coming with him. The
remainder of the short trip was spent in
silence, except for the country music in
the background, as both occupants of
the 'Vette contemplated the approaching situation.
They pulled up in front of Lee's building
and he stepped out onto the street.
'Well, here goes nothing.' He let his fingers trail over the smooth, warm
hood of the Corvette as he rounded the
front of the car to open the passenger
door. Lee extended his hand to help Amanda out of the car and they walked
silently to his building. He released her
hand to hold the door open and
immediately missed the contact with her. As they approached the elevator, he
reached over and took her hand again. She
looked at him with a small smile and
he winked as the doors slid open.
"So where did Francine run off to tonight?"
Lee once again realized how small the
elevator was. "Shouldn't she have come back with you?" He gave a relieved
sigh as the doors opened.
"I dropped her off at her place once we
were done. I believe she was 'picked
up' at the bar tonight." Amanda stopped and shook her head with a grin as Lee
unlocked and pushed open the door to his
apartment for her. "Make that I
believe she picked up someone." Lee laughed and shook his head. Before he
could say anything else, Amanda had taken
off her coat and excused herself to
freshen up in the bathroom. Lee took the opportunity to try and clean up the
mess he had left earlier in the evening. In
the process, he turned on the stereo
and found a country station.
'May as well stick with the mood tonight.'
he thought with a grin.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Amanda stood silently in front of the
bathroom mirror. The conversation in
the 'Vette suddenly caught up with her. 'Nice shirt' he had said. She'd still
had her coat on. It was buttoned all the
way up around her neck against the
cold. 'How did he see the shirt?' She
thought hard.
"Oh my gosh!" she gasped putting her hand
over her mouth. That feeling she'd had
while dancing.
No. He couldn't have been there. Could he?
Why? How could he have known when she
was going to return to the lot for her car? Amanda took a deep breath and
walked out of the bathroom, determined to
find out what was going on with Lee.
As she headed for the living room she heard more country music.
'What is his deal tonight?' she thought.
She composed herself and commented.
"Nice music Stetson. I wasn't aware your
tastes had changed. Or are you getting
your jabs in at not having to take that assignment tonight?" Amanda
laughed at him as he feigned innocence.
"Moi?!" Lee put his hand to his chest. "I
would never . . ." he stopped suddenly
as the strains of a now familiar song started. His breath caught in
his throat and he was suddenly nervous
again. He dropped his hand from his
chest and crossed to where Amanda was standing. Taking a deep breath he
extended his hand to her.
"May I have this dance, Little Lady?" he
asked with an exaggerated Southern
drawl. Amanda smiled slowly and took his hand.
"I'd love to." She answered quietly.
'This song . . .it sounds so familiar.' She
thought as Lee took her in his arms
and started leading her slowly around the living room. She listened
intently; blushing slightly as she realized
it was the song her bar room fantasy
was wrapped around.
'I can't hide the way I feel about you
anymore
I can't hold the hurt inside, keep the pain
out of my eyes anymore
My tears no longer waiting, my resistance
ain't that strong
My mind keeps recreating a life with you
alone
And I'm tired of pretending I don't love
you anymore'
Lee couldn't believe the same song was
playing on his stereo. Tonight was
working out better than even he could have planned. Now if it would just
continue that way. He sighed deeply and
rested his cheek against Amanda's.
"Good song." He whispered huskily in her
ear, pulling her tighter against
himself.
Amanda listened, speechless, as Lee sang
softly with the song. He certainly
couldn't know, could he? He must have been there tonight.
'Let me make one last appeal to show you
how I feel about you
Cause there's no one else I swear holds a
candle anywhere next to you
My heart can't take the beating, not having
you to hold
A small voice keeps repeating, deep inside
my soul
It says I can't keep pretending
I don't love you anymore
I've got to take the chance or let it pass
by
If I expect to get on with my life'
Lee pulled back to look at her.
"Amanda," he started. His eyes met hers and
he was suddenly furious with himself
for the way he'd been treating her the last few weeks. She was always
so trusting of him and he could see that in
her eyes as she stared back at him.
"Lee?" Amanda had said at the same time.
She was about to ask him what was
going on, how he had known she was wearing his shirt and about the song, but
the look in his eyes stopped her dead.
"I'm sorry, Amanda. The way I've been
acting lately . . ."
"Lee, don't. It's all right. You've
apologized already." Amanda started
quietly.
"No, Amanda. No it's not. I've spent all
this time trying to protect you, keep
you from getting hurt and I'm the one who ends up hurting you the most."
He rested his forehead on hers.
"I've told you before, Lee, you don't need
to protect me. I'm capable of taking
care of myself. Mr. Melrose trusts me to take on assignments, why
don't you?" Despite the seriousness in
Amanda's voice, Lee grinned at the
thought of her dancing with Francine earlier in the evening.
"I do, Amanda, it's just . . . I feel . . .
well, responsible, you know that. I
can't help it. But there's more now. With you on assignments without me I
can't keep an eye on you. If anything ever
happened . . . " He drew a deep
breath and looked up at the ceiling before continuing. "I guess that's why I
follow you around. To be near you, to put
my mind at ease . . . to know you're
not getting into trouble . . . " He met her gaze again and said
quietly, "and to make sure I'm there if you
do." Amanda's eyes widened as she
realized with certainty he *had* been watching her tonight.
"You were there tonight, weren't you?" she
said quietly. "I couldn't shake the
feeling that you were there with me but I told myself that was silly. That
you must have had something better to do."
Lee brushed a strand of hair from her
face.
"Amanda, I will never have anything better
to do . . . " His voice had dropped to
a husky whisper. He leaned in to kiss her when she suddenly jerked
back and looked at him, horrified.
'Interrupted again,' He thought wryly. 'And
there isn't anyone else around!'
"Oh my gosh!" She gasped, blushing. "You
saw . . ." Lee gave a rueful laugh,
the moment broken.
"Yes, I saw." His mood darkened almost
imperceptibly and he looked away. "I
saw everything." Amanda disentangled herself from Lee's embrace.
"That's how you knew I was wearing your
shirt." She jabbed a finger at his
chest before turning and plopping down on his couch deep in thought. "I
didn't think about it when you first said
something but when I took my jacket
off I realized there was no way you could have seen what shirt I was wearing
unless you were watching me either at home
or the bar." Lee hung his head.
"Busted." He whispered to himself with a
smirk. He moved to join her on the
couch, determined to finish what she had just interrupted. "I think I was
just interrupted--again." Lee said very
quietly as he looked deep into
Amanda's eyes. He saw the irritation slowly fade and the emotion that
replaced it gave him the confidence to
continue. "And I intend to pick up
exactly where I left off." Amanda reached up and slowly trailed her fingers
down Lee's cheek.
"Lee . . ." He again quieted her with a
finger to her lips.
"Shhh . . . no more talking. I talked
enough for both of us tonight." Lee
said with a grin. He reached up to her hand still resting on his cheek and
brought it to his lips for a kiss, never
breaking eye contact. With a heavy
sigh, Lee released her hand and brought his up to the back of her head. He
leaned into her and brushed his lips across
hers gently. Such a simple kiss. Much
less of a kiss than some they'd had while they'd been 'working'; even
less than the few they'd shared in the last
few weeks but then again, much, much
more. Every time he kissed her the feelings got closer to the surface.
He had reached the point where he wasn't
going to be able to push them down
much longer. Lee was shaken at the intensity he felt in that kiss.
'When it comes to love, you have to be
patient . . . ' Amanda's voice floated
through his thoughts. 'Love? Whoa, slow down, Stetson. Patience.' He tried
desperately to clear his head and form a
coherent thought. He pulled back
slowly, clearing his throat and averting his eyes. If he made eye contact
with her again he didn't think he'd be able
to keep his emotions or his actions in
check. That wasn't what either of them needed at this point.
Despite what he felt they both wanted, he
knew they needed to take things slow.
Amanda wasn't just a passing fancy. That thought brought him back to
reality.
"I, uh, think I'd better get you home." He
stammered. "It's awfully late and
you're going to have a report to file in the morning." Lee stood. Maybe, if
she forgot her car was at the Agency, he'd
be able to pick her up in the morning.
He grinned at his plan and offered her his hand. Taking it, she
stood, shaking her head slowly.
"One of these days, Stetson." Amanda
threatened quietly. He caught her smile
as she brushed past him toward the door.
"One of these days . . . "
The end
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nonplus; TRANSITIVE VERB: To put at a loss
as to what to think, say, or do;
bewilder. NOUN: A state of
perplexity, confusion, or bewilderment.